enthusiastic conscious

So I just wrote what I think is essentially just a stream of consciousness. When I have thoughts rolling around that I just know won’t make sense typed out, I open a Word doc and let my fingers fly and then read back over it and try to make sense of it. Sometimes I’m successful and other times I end up just as confused as I started.

Anyway, I just wrote one of those, but it’s not the one I’m going to show you now. When I saved the document, I started a folder to put it in as well as one I wrote back during finals week in December. I reread it and had to fight the urge to laugh out loud.

When I wrote this one, I had just found out that I passed my Genetics final (which I had been ridiculously stressed about) and needed to express my joy in some way shape or form. Reading over it brought joy to me now because I want to work so hard to approach every aspect of life with the same enthusiasm I felt that day…

Without further adieu, in all of its mess, a stream of consciousness from weeks back:

“I’m going to write one of those stream of consciousness things. What does this even mean? Am I doing it wrong? Like what’s the point am I supposed to suddenly think of something really profound? I don’t know but you know what I really want to dance. Like so much right now. I’m having a really hard time sitting still when I just want to dance to Demi Lovato and DNCE and every song ever. I want to jump and sing at the top of my lungs because I survived!! SO much weight is off my shoulders! Hallelujah! And tomorrow I am going to sleep in which is good because my throat hurts. I am oddly disappointed by this scone I bought. I know that most scones are crumbly and all, but I guess I wasn’t actually craving sweets as much as I thought I was? I don’t know but I am also tired which is crazy considering I had a coffee a 7… I got 8 hours of sleep last night too! It’s just been a stressful few days so I guess my body is just wearing down a tad. I have two more exams this week; one on Friday which is Spanish so I am honestly not too worried and one on Saturday which is important but not nearly as stressful as Genetics! Sorry I had to take a pause because the song playing in the background had electric bagpipes in it. ELECTRIC BAGPIPES?! What even is this life??? Who plays electric bagpipes??? Are those even a thing? I don’t know. But holy crap I feel so happy right now. Like I can’t wipe a grin off my face and I really really really really want to happy dance bc I DID ITTTTT. HOLLA BLESS Y’ALL. I CAN”T EXPLAIN HOW HAPPY I AM ABOUT THIS!!!!

Reading back over that felt ridiculous. And I don’t know if I am going to put this on my blog or not because my mind is apparently a skiddish and crazy place. My ear hurts. Yo ear, you best not be gettin an infection. AINT NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT.


Truth be told, I wish I hadn’t resisted the urge. I never want to resist the urge to dance!



One thought on “enthusiastic conscious

  1. personally, I have always subscribed to the belief that the stream-of-consciousness piece must be read as dramatic reading to be fully appreciated. I can hear the raised voice, feel the clogged ear, and the odd sound when reading “reading back over….”

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