enthusiastic conscious

So I just wrote what I think is essentially just a stream of consciousness. When I have thoughts rolling around that I just know won’t make sense typed out, I open a Word doc and let my fingers fly and then read back over it and try to make sense of it. Sometimes I’m successful and other times I end up just as confused as I started.

Anyway, I just wrote one of those, but it’s not the one I’m going to show you now. When I saved the document, I started a folder to put it in as well as one I wrote back during finals week in December. I reread it and had to fight the urge to laugh out loud.

When I wrote this one, I had just found out that I passed my Genetics final (which I had been ridiculously stressed about) and needed to express my joy in some way shape or form. Reading over it brought joy to me now because I want to work so hard to approach every aspect of life with the same enthusiasm I felt that day…

Without further adieu, in all of its mess, a stream of consciousness from weeks back:

“I’m going to write one of those stream of consciousness things. What does this even mean? Am I doing it wrong? Like what’s the point am I supposed to suddenly think of something really profound? I don’t know but you know what I really want to dance. Like so much right now. I’m having a really hard time sitting still when I just want to dance to Demi Lovato and DNCE and every song ever. I want to jump and sing at the top of my lungs because I survived!! SO much weight is off my shoulders! Hallelujah! And tomorrow I am going to sleep in which is good because my throat hurts. I am oddly disappointed by this scone I bought. I know that most scones are crumbly and all, but I guess I wasn’t actually craving sweets as much as I thought I was? I don’t know but I am also tired which is crazy considering I had a coffee a 7… I got 8 hours of sleep last night too! It’s just been a stressful few days so I guess my body is just wearing down a tad. I have two more exams this week; one on Friday which is Spanish so I am honestly not too worried and one on Saturday which is important but not nearly as stressful as Genetics! Sorry I had to take a pause because the song playing in the background had electric bagpipes in it. ELECTRIC BAGPIPES?! What even is this life??? Who plays electric bagpipes??? Are those even a thing? I don’t know. But holy crap I feel so happy right now. Like I can’t wipe a grin off my face and I really really really really want to happy dance bc I DID ITTTTT. HOLLA BLESS Y’ALL. I CAN”T EXPLAIN HOW HAPPY I AM ABOUT THIS!!!!

Reading back over that felt ridiculous. And I don’t know if I am going to put this on my blog or not because my mind is apparently a skiddish and crazy place. My ear hurts. Yo ear, you best not be gettin an infection. AINT NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT.

RESIST THE URGE TO HAPPY DANCE IN CHERRYWOOD”

Truth be told, I wish I hadn’t resisted the urge. I never want to resist the urge to dance!

Love,

Juliana

One thought on “enthusiastic conscious

  1. personally, I have always subscribed to the belief that the stream-of-consciousness piece must be read as dramatic reading to be fully appreciated. I can hear the raised voice, feel the clogged ear, and the odd sound when reading “reading back over….”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s