I’m in a strange place, I think.
It’s one of energy and exhaustion, of staleness and newness, or routine and spontaneity.
Mostly I feel like I have something waiting for me, but I just haven’t arrived there yet.
“What you seek is seeking you.”
I don’t even necessarily feel bad… Just expectant.
As if I’m waiting to be scared or surprised by something I haven’t seen coming.
“I don’t know” runs through my head a lot. What do I think of this? How do I feel? Where do you want to go? I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.
And I guess, in a way, I am okay with that.
Not knowing strips away my obsessive need to control and that’s good.
But also it’s as if I am waiting for someone to approach me with all the answers.
All in all I just needed to get that off my chest and it just feels a little more organized when I’m writing, as cryptic as it may seem when I reread it hahaha.
Happiest of Mondays to you!