Hi! Long time no see. This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. My AmeriCorps term ends on June 29th and then I’ll hopefully have another job lined up. It’s been a heart-wrenching and stressful thing for me to think about and plan for and I’ve wanted to share why that is the case, but it took me so long to even understand it myself. I struggled to put my anxiety into words. I ended up writing a note to myself about it. Maybe it’ll connect with you, too, if you’re about to graduate or are between jobs. Anyway, enjoy.
Note to self:
What happens next is not the end of the road. It’s not even close.What happens next does not dictate your life path. It does not control the love and joy and passion you’ll feel in your life. Regardless of what you do or where you end up, you are still fulfilling your purpose here on this earth.
It does not matter if the job description does not match the one you’ve created in your head. It will not cement the impact you’ll leave on this earth. Dear self, you feel driven and passionate about what you want to accomplish, but you’ve also let your fear of not accomplishing those dreams blind you from all the other ways you can do something.
Let’s say the food bank (post-AmeriCorps dream job) thinks you’re the worst candidate they’ve ever come across. Girl, you redirect. You do not allow your passions to putter out, although it is terrifying to imagine them doing so. You move full force onto whatever is next. Your energy and soul were not constructed for a single organization.
No. You were born for people. For the world.
The next few months will be intense and intimidating, but you are nothing if not relentless. Keep going. Keep doing. There’s something out there with your name on it and you will find it, no matter what it takes.
Job hunting is exciting and also the worst, but Juliana, no job is wrong for you. Every person, every position, every day teaches you something more valuable than you know. Allow this. Give yourself the grace for this to happen.
No one will judge you for straying from the absurdly rigid path you’ve created in your mind. And if they do, then they do not understand what you have to offer.
“But I’m supposed to be changing the world by now!” you think to yourself. You are. Calm down. You touch the lives of the kids you work with. You make them smile and think about their actions. You tell them that they will change the world. And they will. And so will you.
Also, Juliana. Never let anyone convince you that you are naive or overly ambitious. Move forward through life with full certainty that you can positively change the world in your lifetime. It can be done. It must be done. We need more people willing to protect and uphold that belief.
Breathe. You’ve climbed over so much and yet you’re focusing more on your fear of heights than on how far you’ve come.
You’re doing this perfectly. I can’t what to see what happens!